The Survivor

Photo by Jordan Donaldson | @jordi.d on Unsplash~Kim LibertiniSome people give themselves titles and others earn them. I owe part of my title to the nurture of a woman who somehow managed to carry me through a war-ravaged country, in order to drop me off on the doorstep of an orphanage, with the hope that I would escape … Continue reading The Survivor

Boundaries

Boundaries are as much about what we keep out as let in. When it comes to grief, we frequently talk about building boundaries to prevent people from being prescriptive about how we grieve, telling us to move on, or threatening our fragile and momentary peace. These limits are important and good mostly as preventative measures … Continue reading Boundaries

Mom Lives in Me

I thought my Mom would hang around me after she died. I thought she would appear thick and tangible like a warm fog. I thought she would exist invisible yet present herself through messages and signs. But so many aspects of my mother’s passing are different than imagined, including how she shows up.  Mostly she … Continue reading Mom Lives in Me

The Cat 5 of Life

~Kim Libertini Photo by NASA on Unsplash As the news reports increased and the hurricane storm in the Atlantic assembled, it was clear this storm would be catastrophic.  The latest report had it classified as a Category 5, with wind speeds of 157mph or higher and enough intensity to level houses and destroy buildings. People were not just … Continue reading The Cat 5 of Life

I Talk Aloud to My Dead Mom.

My mother is dead. She’s been gone for almost three years now, and yet, I still speak to her. Aloud. My lone voice greets the air with a “Hey, mom,” when her presence feels particularly strong. Or an “I love you,” after her memory springs vivid. Her spirit lives in and around me and so … Continue reading I Talk Aloud to My Dead Mom.

The Pause

This is a grief blog. The pages intended for sharing the hard journey of stitching oneself together anew after things fall apart. However, grief feels distant this morning. My little family (read: the boys and me) is on a summer vacation. We’re staying with friends in a house perched on a bay filled with boats. … Continue reading The Pause

Recovering

At least once a day a friend, colleague, or stranger asks, “How are you?” My normal response is “fine,” or “good,” or any other terse platitude that fills conversation. Today, because I’m feeling raw and brutally honest, I would say “I’m recovering.” Recovering from my last chapter in life and recovering the next one. The … Continue reading Recovering

Waking Up To Grief

There’s a surreal moment that happens again and again when grieving. It occurs after sleep. Falling asleep is hard enough, and yet waking up feels harder still. That’s when reality comes back into focus. The reality of a life you don’t want. The reality that you’re in free fall. The daunting task of making it … Continue reading Waking Up To Grief