The term, “single mom” just won’t suffice anymore. The time has come to place a jauntier hat on our heads and upgrade this worn-out title to “independent mom,” or dad. For the last few years, I’ve called myself a single mom as way of explaining that my marriage dissolved and the bulk of parenting rests … Continue reading THE TERM SINGLE MOM (OR DAD) SUCKS
Today, I’m giving thanks for tiny joys. All too often, it’s the unmistakable joys - the ones that leave us grinning from ear-to-ear - that receive all the fanfare. But not, today. Today, these microscopic pleasures get their moment in the sun and praises sang. Because it’s tiny joys that get us through the day. … Continue reading Tiny Joys
Happy (Hard) Holidays!
Was this last year hard for you? I want to remind you that you've made it this far, and we're going to usher in 2020 together. But before we do, here's a look back on some of our favorite blog posts of the past year. Go Easy on You: You are too hard on yourself. … Continue reading Happy (Hard) Holidays!
Boundaries are as much about what we keep out as let in. When it comes to grief, we frequently talk about building boundaries to prevent people from being prescriptive about how we grieve, telling us to move on, or threatening our fragile and momentary peace. These limits are important and good mostly as preventative measures … Continue reading Boundaries
At least once a day a friend, colleague, or stranger asks, “How are you?” My normal response is “fine,” or “good,” or any other terse platitude that fills conversation. Today, because I’m feeling raw and brutally honest, I would say “I’m recovering.” Recovering from my last chapter in life and recovering the next one. The … Continue reading Recovering
Mother and Father-Out-Law
I’m a word nerd. I love the sound of words and how the varying combinations of consonants and vowels have unique and specific meaning. But sometimes English fails me. I’m left scrounging for a concept or word that doesn’t exist. For example, there’s no word to describe sunlight sparkling on the ocean. There’s no word … Continue reading Mother and Father-Out-Law
A Letter To My Exhausting Children
Dear children, You are exhausting and relentless and I’m eternally grateful for this. Every morning, at least one of you thumps down the hall into my bedroom. You climb in quietly beside me before twisting like a pretzel on spit, your elbows and knees prodding me erratically. Or, you stand next to the bed and … Continue reading A Letter To My Exhausting Children
Chew On This Memory, Mom
On our walk to school this morning, my boys and I crossed paths with a woman smelling of sweet mint. The scent launched me down memory lane. It zoomed past my forties with their dismantling of family and arrival at the unknown. Past the thirties collaged with growing a career and growing babies. It flew … Continue reading Chew On This Memory, Mom
“There is a crack, a crack in everything. That’s how the light gets in.” So go the powerful lyrics from Leonard Cohen’s, “Anthem.” His words are moving. The message, elegant and hopeful. The song helps give purpose to our brokenness and meaning to our pain and scars. However, I believe the opposite is also true … Continue reading Shine On
Rest Is Best
Hanging on my office wall is a hand-written proclamation from a dear friend, “As the amount of sh*t increases so must the level of nurturing you need.” It’s a cheeky and brightly illustrated reminder that life is hard. The problems and tasks feel relentless, at times. Holding it all together is exhausting. And, a little … Continue reading Rest Is Best