~Kim Libertini There are some people that always ask the big questions. On this night, as we chatted into the late hours, sipping wine and reflecting on life, she asked,”What do you miss most about him?” I paused. I thought. I miss ….. that moment when he walked in the door at the end of a … Continue reading I Miss
Photo by Kelly Sikkema on Unsplash ~Kim Libertini When someone we know suffers loss, it is common to ask the question, "How are you doing?" No matter where I was down the grief path, my response was always the same, but the meaning behind the response changed over time. Time Period What I said Acute stage of grief … Continue reading Being Ok Through Grief
~Kim Libertini Loss triggers the rollout of a thick fog of guilt. That fog sits heavily impairing visibility. Depending on the type of loss and the nature of the relationship, guilt varies. I know this because I grappled with guilt with each successive loss. When I lost my father, I was forced to examine … Continue reading Grappling Guilt and Finding Forgiveness
~Kim Libertini That day, I was at work. The details of that moment I won’t ever forget. I had just finished teaching a class. The main office had paged me. When I arrived, my then husband was standing there. In the midst of the daily school scurry he delivered the news that my father had … Continue reading Your Loss, Your Way
~Kim Libertini Our life is measured in time from the moment time note’s our birth arrival. I’ve been unfair to time with my expectations of how it should behave constantly oscillating between extremes. Speed up through the work week. Slow down through the weekend. Stop during a moment so I can breathe it in for … Continue reading Keeping Time
~Kim Libertini It's 2a.m. My mind racing, I stare at the bedroom ceiling. I make lists. I’m running through options and all possible scenarios, having an argument inside my head. I haven’t slept much with this weighing on me. This is how it works. Unfortunately, this comes with bearing the title sole survivor. When faced … Continue reading It’s 2a.m.
As I attempted to crawl out from the rubble, I remember looking for support. I looked for the faces of those that I expected would be there. Only to find that I had lost many along the way. Years later, I understand why and how this happens. Back then, these added losses compounded my grief … Continue reading Gains
My mom was a blonde, standing about 5 foot 5 inches tall with steel blue eyes. Being adopted she and I share no physical traits whatsoever. She’s been gone over 7 years now. The longer she’s gone, the more I see how much, despite the lack of genetics, she influenced the woman and mother I … Continue reading Love Leaves A Mark
Grief changed me. Not just in the obvious ways. Suddenly I own a keen awareness of the power of words, an understanding that a smile doesn’t always reflect happiness and a heightened sensitivity toward others. It’s unfortunate that people miss the way their words can be interpreted. For the most part, I don’t think the … Continue reading Digesting Words After Grief
There is a special dish in my china cabinet that my children know I use when we have company. As I take it from the cabinet shelf and carry it to the kitchen, I can hear my mom’s voice. I think about her while I’m filling the plate with food and her face becomes a … Continue reading Treasures Left Behind
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